This year’s “Imperialist Pig-Fucker Day” celebration ended up a little…how to say it? Wonky. Earlier this month, it didn’t look like I would be able to get Wednesday – the day I reserve for traveling – off work. Not even a half day. My brother and his girlfriend are going to her mother’s in Kalamazoo, MI. Essentially, my parents would celebrate alone. I invited them up to Chicago and it looked like they might come, but their circumstances are too tenuous for travel at the moment. (ed. note: hey there, health care industry! give my dad a job already! quit fuckin’ around. you guys are supposed to be “recession proof,” right?) Thankfully, they will be dining with friends, some from Germany who have never experienced the bacchanal that is an American Thanksgiving. Also, as things tend to go, I got a memo this past Monday afternoon that the office will close early. So here I am, Wednesday morning, getting ready to finish up the grocery shopping for our Thanksgiving for Two. Despite the wild vacillations life tends to take, regardless of how our best laid plans are frequently foiled, we have a lot to be thankful for. To celebrate, we have the following in the line-up:

Roasted leg of lamb with garlic and rosemary
Brussel sprouts with bacon and figs – these are strictly for me. Jeff wants nothing to do with these evil things.
String beans with garlic and ginger – yes, the New York Times inspired my sidedish choices.
Carmelized corn with fresh mint
Stove Top stuffing – ha ha! Fooled you into thinking we were total paunchy cooks! Stove Top is the shit.
Lynn S. cranberry sauce – I tasted some during one of many nocturnal wanderings about the house last night. It’s fucking phenomenal. Granted, the Ocean Spray canned jelly version excites me too. I am a die-hard cranberry eater. However, hers is a perfect blend of tart cranberry, clean, sweet citrus and earthy clove; the best of all cranberry worlds. Our landlady totally rocks. Also, this is mine all mine. Jeff does not partake of the cranberry.
Spiced sweet potato pudding – This is my wild card. Love of my life is ambivalent about sweet potato anything, but likes pumpkin pie in so far as it’s a vehicle for whipped cream. This dish seems sweet enough to tread into that territory, but we have so much food already. We’ll see.

For dessert – Dark chocolate flan with blah blah blah delicious

This will all be paired with hot sake.

So there it is. Happy Thanksgiving to all! Remember that the first one was hardly a friendly sit-down to celebrate diversity, but don’t be such a Marxist historian that it ruins your long weekend. Sleep. Eat. Shag. Be grateful that you can. And don’t forget to leave a little something outside for the dead homies.

Love and molotovs from the Windy City,